Something Like Rebirth
by Objective Mistress
Summary: What occurs after Korra's confrontation with the Red Lotus is not an end, but a beginning. After realizing that the game of life has changed, acceptance is the next step on the path to healing. But accepting the facts doesn't always immediately yield positive results. [Korra and Asami go for a drive and have a talk, with a hint of Makorra]


**Title:** Something Like Rebirth

**Rating: **K+

**Word Count:** ~2200

**Summary:** What occurs after Korra's confrontation with the Red Lotus is not an end, but a beginning. After realizing that the game of life has changed, acceptance is the next step on the path to healing. But accepting the facts doesn't always immediately yield positive results. [Korra and Asami go for a drive and have a talk, with a hint of Makorra]

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"Korra?"

She heard knuckles rapping lightly against the paneled door.

Korra rolled over away from the sound, pulling the blankets tightly against her. It was easier here. In bed, with only an occasional scuffle of Naga's paws against the floor to keep her company, it was possible to forget the physical limitations that the confrontation with the Red Lotus left her with. Getting out of bed in the morning was an ordeal to put it lightly. Getting dressed required assistance, and walking was impossible, let alone anything more strenuous. And despite the assurances of the cadre of healers especially for her, things were not getting better, or at least, not as fast as Korra hoped.

Asami slid the door open carefully, "Have you gotten up yet today?"

Her friends and family rotated in shifts to pull her out from the warm cocoon of her covers into the harsh reality of day. Her parents are the most frequent, caring for her like she was little again before she left for the White Lotus Compound. Often it's Asami, who was more than happy to help Korra dress in the mornings. Sometimes it's Bolin with a fake smile and a boisterous voice. When she was lucky, Mako came to her aid as long as he isn't working.

"No," Korra's voice came out muffled.

"Why don't we go for a drive today?" Asami opened the curtains so the midday light streamed into the dark room.

She didn't want to, but it was not as if she had a choice. Ever since the poisoning, sleep wasn't coming easy. Korra felt weak and uncoordinated even just moving her arms. The way her hands shook and tremored made her useless at nearly everything. Headaches were a new constant during each of her waking hours to the point that sometimes she misheard or didn't hear friends speaking to her. And her vision, especially peripherally, felt tunneled and hazy. It was hard to believe that she would ever recover to what she once was.

The wounds were slow to fade. Even the bruises that tinted her skin just slightly purple held on and persisted even four weeks after. It was as if she had emerged out from the encounter another person, one who, like when she was a child, needed constant care.

Asami went through the now familiar motions of helping her out of bed. She pulled out a fresh set of clothing and helped her thread her uncooperative limbs in. Korra let her friend brush her hair out, but opted against wolf tails unsurprisingly. She didn't feel like herself; why woud she bother pretending that she could look anything other than vulnerable and weak?

Eventually, the non-bender slung half of the Avatar's weight over her shoulders to help her into her wheelchair. Korra did her best to bear weight on her legs with no luck.

The wheelchair was like a prison. It was the only device that kept her remotely mobile, yet it trapped her so completely. Even worse, she had difficulty maneuvering Air Temple Island alone, with its winding paths and staircases. It was just another reminder that she lived in a world that perhaps didn't quite have a place for her.

"Do you want me to drive this time when we go out?"

Last time, Asami insisted that Korra "drive." After helping her into the driver's seat, Korra couldn't still the shake in her hand well enough to even get the key in the ignition. It truly was hard to believe that there was any condition that would make her a worse driver than she was unscathed. So instead, the two sat there until Korra said it was time to go back inside.

"Yeah," Korra dropped her hands into her lap.

The wheelchair creaked forward as Asami moved them towards the garage. She helped Korra into the passenger seat, and crossed the buckle across her body until it clicked closed.

The car rides had become a frequent thing between them. More often than not, they didn't talk. The sounds of whirring tires and engine noise filled the car with white noise. The silence was easy; Asami never pushes her to converse. It was just a way to get out, a way to feel free if only for an hour and watch the landscape pass smoothly by out the window.

Before the battle, Korra could run. She could fly with the aid of her glider or firebending to soar as high as she pleased. She could swim and propel herself in a sort of weightlessness through the water. But now, things were different. She was damaged. She was more injured than she had even been previously. And now, more than ever, she realized how dangerous it is to be the Avatar, or anyone close.

"Can we put the top down?" Korra looked weakly over at Asami as soon as they passed out of Republic City limits.

"Of course." She pulled over quickly and whisked the top back over them.

From here, on it was all scenery. It was rolling mountains instead of towering skyscrapers and expectant reporters. The wind whipped at her hair, conjuring up images of running with Naga. Riding her polar bear dog was one of the few freedoms she enjoyed through her entire life, now she didn't even have the strength to pull herself up on the creature's back. Even if she could, she lacked the balance and endurance to stay on top of Naga even on an easy ride.

No one expected her to bounce back right away, but she still felt the weight of expectations on her shoulders. She endured the loss of her bending and her past lives far easier than this. It felt as if her recovery was out of her control. There was nothing she could do.

After the battle, she was born anew in a worse way than she ever imagined possible.

It was more than the physical. Korra was missing _something._ A spark of emotion and vibrancy that twinkled mischievously in her eye had dulled. She has changed, and there seemed to be no way to go back. It was funny for her to think that she once thought that losing her bending was her lowest point. How much worse would things get?

"Asami?" Korra's voice was small, lacking presence it once had.

"Yeah?"

It was becoming more difficult bottling it all in. She felt so…empty. It was as if she was dead inside, yearning for just a feeling, _any_ feeling to convince her that she was indeed still human despite all that had happened.

"Remember how you said I could talk to you?" Korra closed her eyes and tried to enjoy the ride.

"My offer still stands," Asami stole a glance in her direction, "…if you want to. You know it's fine if we don't talk on these rides."

It was difficult to open up after such a long time keeping things to herself. The contents of her mind were so under pressure she didn't know exactly where to begin, but Mako popped into her mind as he often did. Lately she communicated mostly in clipped sentences, quick nods, and long stares. Silence was easy, but she was getting desperate.

She tried to swallow her apprehension. "Would it be weird if we talked about Mako?"

"Of course not. Why would it be weird?"

"Well I know that you said that we're past that but I just didn't know if it was going to be a sore subject or anything like that," Korra's uninterrupted sentence reminded her of her old, carefree self.

"Korra, I promise you that I'm over Mako. I've been that way for a while now," she shifted gears expertly, rounding the mountainous road's corners with ease. "I'm your friend. I'm here to listen if you need it, and respond if you want me to."

"I guess I miss him…I guess…" Korra looked down at her feet.

"He's been around a lot. He likes caring for you."

"I shouldn't need caring for."

"Korra," Asami pulled the car over to a graveled area beside the road and turned in her seat. "Just because you need help right now doesn't make you weak."

"That isn't the point," she huffed.

"Okay," Asami kept her voice soft, "then what do you miss about him?"

There were far too many things to list as an answer to that question. Many of those answers Korra felt very uncomfortable talking with _anyone_ about. She missed how she felt being around him. She always _felt_ when she was with him. After the breakup, the emotions associated with interactions with him weren't always positive, but they were something. Despite how caring he was as he helped her now, Korra could feel that he was still trying to keep a respectful distance. But to be honest with herself, she didn't know what she wanted.

Asami started the car again after Korra sat for a few minutes of unexplained silence and pulled out on the road for their inbound trip back through the city and back on to the ferry to Air Temple Island. "It's okay if you aren't ready."

"Sorry…" she mumbled.

"There's no need to apologize. I promise. But if you do feel ready, I'm here. And you know that Mako, Tenzin, and your parents are ready to listen too."

The idea that weighed so heavily in her mind was scary, so much so it seemed impossible to admit. The fact of the matter was, Korra wasn't needed. The Avatar wasn't needed any longer. That was an impossible pill to swallow.

The Air Nation made a commitment to balance and peace in the world. She didn't take down any of the Red Lotus during the battle; it was either her friends or a team effort. Even Mako, who once professed how much he "needed" her, was getting on just fine on his own.

Maybe they were right. Maybe Amon, Unalaq, and Zaheer saw something she didn't. Perhaps this newly born world really didn't need an Avatar. And here she was, squinting her eyes against the harsh light that shone at the end of the tunnel, her eyes unable to adjust to the change in conditions no matter how much she tried.

The trip back to Air Temple Island felt quicker than the trip out. Asami pulled the top back over as they travelled through the city to the ferry. Korra kept her eyes in her lap as they passed by block after block. Although the windows of the car were tinted, she had no desire to catch the eyes of other Satomobile passengers or pedestrians. Those were the people who she was supposed to be serving and protecting, now she couldn't even do that for herself.

A tall figure, coat blowing in the light breeze off the bay waited at the ferry platform on the other side. It was easy to recognize the silhouette as Mako.

"Hey look!" Asami gave Korra a gentle nudge. "Looks like he got off his shift early."

"Yeah…" Korra shrugged. It wasn't as if he _needed_ to be here.

As soon as Asami drove off the ferry and parked, Mako jumped into help. He pulled the wheelchair from the back of the car and unfolded it.

"Did you have a good drive?" He smiled softly.

"It was fine."

"Can I help you into your chair?"

"Sure." Once again, not like she had a choice.

Mako gently slid an arm under her knees and one behind her back, and lifted her slowly out of the Satomobile, careful to mind her head. He slowly lowered her into the chair. "Would you like to go for a walk or something?"

Korra folded her hands in her lap, "I'm pretty tired."

"That's fine, I'll take you back to your room."

She sort of hated how accommodating everyone was. At some level, it felt patronizing although she knew they did it to show that they cared.

"You don't have to do this," she murmured, half hoping he wouldn't hear her.

"I _want _to," he laid a hand on her shoulder quickly before removing it to continue pushing her wheelchair along. "You're going to get better."

Someday, maybe she would feel enough like the old Korra to give things another shot with him. But for now, she had so much to be fixed with her it was difficult to even think of others.

Mako carried her into bed and tucked her under the covers. He delivered a chaste kiss to her forehead, "Now get some rest." He sat down in the chair by the window looking over Yue Bay.

She knew it was futile to tell him he didn't have to stay. But despite everything, some things didn't change.

But for her, things were not changing, at least, not fast enough. If there was anything Korra learned, it was that change was inevitable, and ever-present. Her situation would change and she would be fully reborn into the next incarnation of herself. The question was, when?

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**Author Note:** Credit to Kwongs for the idea of Asami taking Korra for drives.


End file.
